Be firm on your goal, fight your inabilities, celebrate your failures

Do you fear failure? This is a fear that many people have, but may not realize. Many may realize, but not admit it. Have you ever stopped trying or avoided even starting towards a goal because you thought you would fail? And maybe you will fail. But what if you didn't? What would it be like if you tried, and didn't fail? What if you won? What would your life be like when you achieve what you wanted to?

What is the definition of failure? The dictionary defines failure as "a lack of success" and "the neglect or omission of required action". So failure is not something that happens when you don't succeed. Failure is when you decide to give up. As long as you are trying, you have not failed yet.

Think about it—a baby tries to stand for the first time, and falls. It tries again and falls again. The baby doesn't give up just because it tried to stand and walk a few times but didn't succeed. The baby didn't think, 'maybe I am not meant to walk'. It keeps trying, and finally walks successfully, no matter how many times it had to try and fail before it succeeded.

As we grow up, we gain a better understanding of society's attitude towards failed attempts. The winner is praised generously, and the others are quickly forgotten or looked down upon. This starts to influence us, and we worry about what others will think about us if we don't win. The hesitation of being known as a failure in the first attempt causes us to not try at all. Why is there so much pressure to succeed all at once? Do all winners win in the first attempt? Every winner is a winner because he never allowed himself to give up when he failed. Mahendra Singh Dhoni, one of the most famous captains of Indian cricket, has a winning percentage of 59%. Micheal Jordan, the legendary basketball player, made 700+ wins and 366 losses. Padmashree Mohanlal and Padmashree Mammootty, who are evergreen actors of Malayalam cinema, started their careers with multiple flops and disasters and went on to become names that will be remembered forever. And even with all the successes they have accomplished and experience they have gained, there are still flops that happen from time to time. How did all these sports stars and film stars become successful and continue to succeed in spite of failures? The answer is simple- because they learnt what they can from their instance of failure and used that knowledge as a stepping stone for their next attempt.

We have to focus on progress, and not look at an immediate win-o-loss verdict. Winning or losing is always in comparison with others. When you compare yourself with others, either you will always be unhappy that you are not as good as them, or else you will stop trying to become better once you have won. In the long run, this will stop you from reaching your true potential, because you have limited your growth by limiting yourself to just being better than those you are competing with. The only person you should be in competition is with yourself.

Be in competition with yourself and work on improving your skills continually. It is OK to fail. Failing a few times does not define you as a person. Each time you try and fail, there is something new you have learned. The lessons you learn and the experience you gain from a failed attempt will not come to you without the attempt that you made. Those lessons and experience are your stepping stones to the time you finally succeed. Remember-that so long as you are trying, you have not failed. So long as you are breathing, you have another opportunity to try again. So don't despair.

The people with major accomplishments did not accomplish what they did because they did not fear failure. They did not let that fear stop them. They cared more about their goal than about the fear that was stopping them. Don't be deterred by the fear of what other people think about you. What other people think about you is none of your concern. On a daily basis, how much time do you spend thinking about other people's failures? That should be a good indicator of how much time others also spend thinking about your failures. People have their own priorities to think about—they are not thinking about you. So stop worrying about what other people think, and live each day of your life as you want to live it.

Everyone is happy to succeed. But success does not come easy. Anything worth something will not come easy. Everyone sees the benefits, perks and the glories of success. But look closer, and you will see that behind the story of success and glory they are enjoying, is the hard work, struggle, effort, rejection, disappointment, and failure they endured; despite all that they still persevered to enjoy that success.

Let us strive to change the mindset of hating failure. Let us celebrate every failure just like we celebrate success. All you need is to try your best – then, celebrate the effort you have put in and the experience you have gained. You cannot truly succeed till you have failed enough a number of times to be comfortable enough with failure to get up and try again and again. That's what success is all about—getting back up and trying again.

If you still fear failure, remember, fear kills more dreams than failure ever will. Whether in this attempt or in your next attempt—what if you didn't fail? What if you won?

What are the dreams you will accomplish if you know you won't fail?